How many times have you been preparing for an audition or recital and no matter how much slow practice and technical work you do, you still struggle to get that passage cleanly or accurately, or your fingers or tongue just don’t work the way you know they can? You lock yourself in your studio or practice room and drill it over and over but still can’t make it flow the way you want. All of us struggle with this from time to time. Does this make you a bad flutist? Absolutely not! However, you are likely getting in your own way without even realizing it.
Frequently, in situations like this, we find ourselves trapped, so to speak: just you, your flute, and your music alone in your practice space, focusing so hard to get things just right. What we end up doing in scenarios like this is creating a sort of artificial claustrophobia. Even if you aren’t claustrophobic, the sensation of feeling stuck in one small space is still ever present. You end up creating tension in your body that keeps you from gaining the fluidity and musicality that you worked so hard to achieve. So, what can you do to break free from this trap?
Many fields of study, from psychology to religion to theatre, refer to multiple spheres of consciousness or awareness, with several variations and theories on the topic. The basic premise comes down to an awareness of self in the center, an awareness of our present surroundings at the next level, and an awareness of the world on the outside level. Some fields recognize multiple other levels within these spheres, but for our purposes we’re going to focus on these three.
AWARENESS OF SELF
The center-most sphere is the one in which we often find ourselves trapped. This isn’t to say that having an awareness of self is a bad thing—quite the contrary. We need to be aware of what our bodies are doing while we practice, what we’re feeling, and what we’re thinking. These factors greatly contribute to the outcome of our practice session and can ultimately affect how we perform.
Where we end up going wrong is when we close off to anything else happening in and around ourselves. We concentrate and focus so hard that we lose sight of what we’re trying to do. If you’re so tied up in what your fingers and tongue are doing and how cleanly they’re doing it, you forget to listen for the music you’re trying to make. You trap yourself in a bubble, tensing your body in an effort to control your movements, and finding yourself in an endless loop making the same errors over and over again. Conversely, when you open up your awareness just a little bit, your body can start to release some of that tension, and you can begin to really listen to the music coming from your instrument.
AWARENESS OF OUR SURROUNDINGS
The next sphere invites us to be aware of our surroundings: the room or space we occupy, the quality of light, the temperature of the air, the sounds we hear. As musicians, this sphere is extremely important. It not only opens us up to a larger space and alleviates some of that claustrophobic tension, but it also provides us with a great deal of information. When we open our awareness to include our surroundings, we get to hear how our sound resonates around us, in front of us, above us, behind us, and to the sides of us. We start to notice just how fluidly or not our technique is actually progressing.
Cultivating this awareness in the studio or practice room will also train you to listen for how your sound will interact in any performance space you will be in for a recital or audition. Is the space dry and dead? Is it lively? Boomy? Should you slow some of your tempos to make sure your articulations are clear and precise? Should you raise your dynamics just a bit to make sure you can be heard in the back of the hall? Should you reduce your tempo a hair to be sure your articulations are clear?
Being aware of your surroundings is a vital skill as a musician and should be practiced in tandem with your technical and tonal work. It also allows you to be prepared for any surprises that may occur in your performance situations: if someone’s cellphone rings, if an audience member gets up to leave in the middle of a piece, if the door slams loudly, etc. We will go over some tools and techniques for practicing this level of awareness later.
AWARENESS OF THE WORLD
The final sphere we’ll be exploring is the awareness of the outside world. This one might seem a little silly to discuss at first, but it provides us with a great deal of overall perspective. When we allow ourselves to be aware, not just of the world around us but also the fact that it will keep moving and turning no matter what happens in our practice or performance, we gain freedom, begin to trust in the work that we’ve put in, and know that—whatever happens—we will survive to make music another day.
It may seem a bit corny to state it in such a manner, but think about it: if you crack one note in a recital, will the building come crashing down on you? If one group of sixteenth notes feels a smidge uneven in your run of the Mendelssohn Scherzo, will you burst into flames? No, absolutely not!
We tend to put a great deal of pressure on ourselves to strive for perfection, which is truly unattainable. Even if you feel like you put on a flawless performance, there will be someone in the audience who will have an opinion that begs to differ. Does that make your opinion any less valid? Or is their opinion the correct one? No—on both counts. Music and art are incredibly subjective, and our world is full of people and opinions that, frankly, don’t matter that much in the grand scheme. When we open our awareness to include the whole world, suddenly the opinions of one or two (or a committee of) people aren’t so important. You will live to make music another day!
PRACTICING AN OPEN AWARENESS
So, how do we practice opening our awareness? Start small and without your flute. Find a comfortable place to sit or lie on the floor. Your eyes can be open or closed, whichever works for you in the moment. Now, just observe.
- SELF: Observe your body. Do you feel any pain? Tension? Where is it located? Also notice what doesn’t hurt. Feel the support of the floor under your body. What do you notice about your clothing, the way it feels on your skin? Just notice, observe, and be aware.
- SURROUNDINGS: Observe your surroundings. How is the temperature of the air within your space? How is the quality of the light, or is the light turned off? What sounds and smells do you notice in your periphery? Are there any patterns or markings on the walls or ceiling?
- THE WORLD: Observe what you notice about the world outside, at least to the degree that you’re able to in the space you occupy. Maybe you’re in an inner room and cannot hear if there are cars driving by or people talking outside. Maybe you do hear these things. Maybe there are people walking and talking just down the hall from you. If there are windows, what can you see through them in your peripheral vision? Vehicles driving around? People walking and talking? Birds singing? Maybe it’s raining out or the wind is blowing. Just observe and be aware.
By adding this exercise into your routine for five to ten minutes a few times a week, you’ll begin to notice a great deal more about the world around you. If you are someone who is naturally very jumpy or easily startled, you may even see some improvement in your ability to anticipate or even avoid situations that would normally catch you off guard.
Over time, you’ll be able to apply this exercise in your flute practice as well. When you’re in a practice session and you find yourself struggling to get your fingers and articulation to line up in your Mozart Concerto or that augmented second in your opening Daphnis run just will not stop cracking, take a moment to check in with your body. Where do you feel tension? I’m not talking about tension just in the tongue or fingers. Do you feel tension in your legs? Your feet? Is your breathing more shallow? Are your shoulders raised? Is your core tight?
These are all symptoms that can be associated with feelings of claustrophobia, of feeling trapped in your space even if you’re not actually trapped. Take a moment, breathe deep, and try your passage again with the intention of listening to how the sounds you’re producing are interacting with the space around you. And rather than specifically working to release the tension you’re feeling, set a goal to improve the sound that you hear within your space. By doing this, you will free yourself from the trapped feeling inside your body and the bubble around it. Then, you will be able to interact and work with the space you’re occupying, allowing your body to let go of that tension naturally by taking the focus off of the mechanics and placing it on the sounds that you hear outside your body.
Once you feel a bit more at ease with listening to your sound in the space, take it one step further and allow yourself to notice and be aware of any sights or sounds that might occur outside of the space. What do you hear out in the hallway? Out on the street or in the woods? You don’t need to focus on these things, but you should be aware of them. Once you’ve had a moment to open your awareness to the outside world like this, notice how your body feels when you play that difficult passage again. Are you still holding as much tension? Did you gain any fluidity in the technique and sound? Did everything suddenly become easier to play?
Oftentimes, we get in our own way by simply confining ourselves to our own bubble—just yourself, your flute, and your music. When we open our awareness, we allow ourselves the capacity to interact with the music in a different and exciting way, noticing the sound within the space just as our audience might notice it. We also give ourselves permission to make mistakes, fix those mistakes with freedom in our bodies, and learn to recover quickly and effectively within a performance situation. This is achieved not by avoiding the mistake, but by working through it in a safe, open environment that we create for ourselves.